Monday, May 08, 2006

Wherein we feel the Republicans' pain and help out a little

The Republicans are facing a tough battle in the midterms, what with Mr. 31% and all. So Kos invited compassionate progressives to help them out by thinking up campaign slogans. It's a creative bunch and there's a large amount of leeway given that we're talking SUV- and Hummer-sized bumper stickers, so we got some interesting results. Like this one:

Gay illegal aliens are coming here to burn the American Flag and wave the Mexican flag while they sing the National Anthem in Spanish and try to get married to one another--while never paying taxes!

There were also some pithy short ones:
If you don't vote for us, lesbians will take your guns.
If you don't feel like wading through 500+ comments, here's my selection of favorites.

GOP 2006: Blowjobs are out, snowjobs are in.

GOP 2006: No sin we can’t spin.

Wrong, corrupt, inept – what’s not to like?

Because we haven’t stolen all your money yet.

Vote for us, or Diebold will do it for you.

Vote for us because if you don't, Hollywood liberals will force your children to marry other children of the same sex, and then will brand the numbers 666 on their heads.

It’s still Bill Clinton’s fault.

9/11! Iran! 9/11! Iran! 9/11! Iran! 9/11! Iran!

Vote for [Candidate X] – He’s still not indicted!

Destroying America before the terrorists can.

You say fascism like it’s a bad thing.

Return us to power; resistance is futile.

No-bid contracts are yummy like butter!

Why change now, when things are going so well?

Because the Constitution really is just a piece of paper.

Killing brown people on five continents.

Stamping out poverty one poor person at a time.

The new GOP: now with SEX!

We had to destroy the Bill of Rights in order to save it.

Batshit crazy since 2000!

Vote for us or God will kill you.

2 comments:

leolabeth said...

This is the funniest thing I've seen in days.

Just when I think I couldn't possibly be on dailykos one second more without actually growing roots from my glutes, I miss this.

Thanks, alnadem. You're a pal.

Alna Dem said...

Glad to be of service. We can't all watch it 24 hours!