I want to remember this forever, perhaps tattoo it on my body

Bill Maher:

There is a big difference between a disappointing friend and a deadly enemy. Of course the Democrats are disappointing---that's what makes them Democrats. If they were any more frustrating they'd be your relatives. But in this country they are all that stands between you and darkest night. You know why their symbol is the letter 'D'? Because it's a grade that means 'good enough, but just barely.' You know why the Republican symbol is 'R'? Because it's the noise a pirate makes when he robs you and feeds you to a shark.

[Everyone else seems to have already read this quote. Can't find the original source, so no citation. h/t Bill in Portland Maine]